🤣 Funny!

On a flight, a man sat down next to Little Johnny and tried to make small talk.

“Hey there,” the man said. “I’ve read that chatting makes flights seem shorter. Want to talk?”

Johnny sighed, closing his book. “Sure,” he said. “What do you want to talk about?”

The man shrugged. “How about nuclear energy?”

Johnny nodded thoughtfully. “Alright, but before we dive into that, can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” said the man.

“Okay,” said Johnny. “A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass, right? But a deer leaves tiny pellets, a cow drops big flat pies, and a horse makes clumps. Any idea why that is?”

The man frowned. “No clue.”

Johnny leaned back. “Well then,” he said, if you don’t know s**t, maybe nuclear power’s a bit above your level.”
 
A Queensland police stopped at a farm in Maleny and talked to an old farmer who was working on his tractor.He told the farmer ,”l have suspicion that there is cannabis growing on your property and l need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs right now”. The old timer said ,”Okay, officer, but please, don’t go in that field over there “,as he pointed out the location.

The cop verbally exploded saying,”Mister,l have the authority of the state and Federal government with me”,he instantly opened his police wallet to produce his badge and arrogantly displayed it in the farmer’s face.”See this badge , mate, this badge means l’m allowed by law to go wherever l wish...in any land...no questions asked...do you understand?!”.

The farmer nodded politely, apologised, then continued working on his tractor.A short time later, the old farmer heard loud screams, looked up and saw the cop running for his life, being chased by the farmer’s big Brahman bull with the biggest horn in town. With every step, the bull gaining ground on the officer,and it seem likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified !

The farmer threw down his tools ran to the fence and yelled on top of his lungs...” your badge, show him your badge!!!”.
 
After his check-up, the doctor smiled at the elderly man and said, “Well, you seem to be in great shape! Any health concerns on your mind?”

“Actually, yes, doc,” the old man replied. “Every time I make love to my wife, after the first round, I’m hot and sweaty. But after the second time, I’m freezing and shivering. What’s up with that?”

Curious, the doctor decided to examine his wife as well. After finishing, he reassured her, “You’re in perfect health! Do you have any concerns or questions for me?”

She shook her head. “Nope, I’m all good.”

The doctor scratched his head. “Well, your husband mentioned something odd. He says after the first time you make love, he’s burning up, but after the second time, he’s shivering like it’s winter. Any idea why?”

The elderly lady rolled her eyes and chuckled. “Oh, that silly old man… That’s because the first time is in August, and the second time is in the winter.
 
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