🤣 Funny!

Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day, and both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven. Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in.

The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven. Dolly takes off her top and says, "Look at these; they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."

The Angel thanks Dolly and asks Her Majesty the same question. The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, and drinks it down. Then, pees into a toilet and pulls the lever. The Angel says, "Okay, Your Majesty, you may go in."

Dolly is outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down! She pees into a toilet and she gets in! Would you explain that to me?" "Sorry Dolly," says the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a Royal Flush beats a Pair no matter how big they are."
 
”God reaches out to Bob, and says , “ Bob, you have lived a wonderful life you’re honest, kind, go to church every Sunday, always help your neighbors. In fact, you lead such a great life, I would like to grant you one wish. Anything you want”.

Bob thinks for a moment and says, “ Yes, God , I know what I want! I am afraid to fly, but l’ve always wanted to go to Hawaii. Can you build me a bridge over the ocean to Hawaii so l can drive there?”

God gets a little angry and says “Bob, I didn’t think someone like you would try to take advantage of my generous offer. Do you have any idea how much work that would be, , to runs thousands of pilings from the ocean floor and then to pour the ridiculous amount of concrete that would have to be poured? That is an overwhelming job even for me”.

Bob apologizes and God says, “ Think of something else you want “. Bob ponders for a moment, then says, “ I know. If you can just explain women to me, what they want, how they think , you know, just help me understand women”.

There’s a long pause, then God says, “ Exactly where do you want that bridge built?”
 
docw1 said:
”God reaches out to Bob, and says , “ Bob, you have lived a wonderful life you’re honest, kind, go to church every Sunday, always help your neighbors. In fact, you lead such a great life, I would like to grant you one wish. Anything you want”.

Bob thinks for a moment and says, “ Yes, God , I know what I want! I am afraid to fly, but l’ve always wanted to go to Hawaii. Can you build me a bridge over the ocean to Hawaii so l can drive there?”

God gets a little angry and says “Bob, I didn’t think someone like you would try to take advantage of my generous offer. Do you have any idea how much work that would be, , to runs thousands of pilings from the ocean floor and then to pour the ridiculous amount of concrete that would have to be poured? That is an overwhelming job even for me”.

Bob apologizes and God says, “ Think of something else you want “. Bob ponders for a moment, then says, “ I know. If you can just explain women to me, what they want, how they think , you know, just help me understand women”.

There’s a long pause, then God says, “ Exactly where do you want that bridge built?”
Click to expand...

"... and will that be two lanes or four lanes?"
 
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