🤣 Funny!

On a bus, a priest sat next to a drunk who was struggling to read a newspaper.

Suddenly, with a slurred voice, the drunk asked the priest: "Do you know what arthritis is?"

The parish priest soon thought of taking the opportunity to lecture the drunk and replied:
"It's a disease caused by sinful and unruly life: excess, consumption of alcohol, drugs, marijuana, crack, and certainly lost women, prostitutes, promiscuity, sex, binges, and other things I dare not say."

The drunk widened his eyes, shut up, and continued reading the newspaper.

A little later, the priest, thinking that he had been too hard on the drunk, tried to soften: "How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't have arthritis! It says here in the paper that the Pope has it."
 
Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy looking like he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he is walking with a limp.

"What happened to you? asks Sean the bartender.
"Jamie O’ Connor and me had a fight." says Paddy.
"That little ***** O’ Connor", says Sean "He couldn’t do that to you, he must of had something in his hand."

"That he did. says Paddy ''a shovel is what he had, and a terrible licking he gave me with it"

"Well'' says Sean, "you should have defended yourself, didn’t you have something in your hand?"

''That I did'' said Paddy... "Mrs. O'Connor's breast, and a thing of beauty it was, but useless in a fight."

(Happy St. Patric's Day)
 
Belisaerio said:
Many years ago, when my wife and I got married (the year started with a 19) I used to joke with her that my lifelong ambition was to become a curmudgeon. She recently informed me that I can check that one off.
Click to expand...
Why age gracefully when could age like old cheese...

full of character and slightly offensive... 🧀
 
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