Following the rules...
🤣 Funny!
- Thread starter docw1
- Start date
OP
OP
An elderly couple entered a burger joint …
… and sat next to a table where some young people were having dinner.
The old man walked over to the counter and made an order for himself.
He unwrapped the burger, cut it in half and put one half next to his wife.
Carefully, he counted all the fries and did the same.
He dipped two straws in the soda and put it between himself and his wife.
The old lady began to eat her half of the burger while the people stared compassionately.
A young man approached them and offered to buy them another portion of food.
The old woman replied, no, don't bother. We just share everything.
People realised that the old man hadn't eaten after a little while. He only watched as his wife ate.
So the same young man approached and repeated his offer.
This time, the old man spoke. No, no, it's fine. We just share everything.
Then the young man said to the old man. What are you waiting for?
The old man looked up and said, The teeth.
… and sat next to a table where some young people were having dinner.
The old man walked over to the counter and made an order for himself.
He unwrapped the burger, cut it in half and put one half next to his wife.
Carefully, he counted all the fries and did the same.
He dipped two straws in the soda and put it between himself and his wife.
The old lady began to eat her half of the burger while the people stared compassionately.
A young man approached them and offered to buy them another portion of food.
The old woman replied, no, don't bother. We just share everything.
People realised that the old man hadn't eaten after a little while. He only watched as his wife ate.
So the same young man approached and repeated his offer.
This time, the old man spoke. No, no, it's fine. We just share everything.
Then the young man said to the old man. What are you waiting for?
The old man looked up and said, The teeth.
OP
OP
A Russian, an American and a British admiral …
…were having a drink on an American aircraft carrier. They were talking about the bravery of their sailors.
The Russian said, I will demonstrate the bravery of our sailors. He calls a sailor over and says, jump off the ship, swim under it and climb back up.
The sailor promptly salutes, jumps off a flight deck, swims under the ship, climbs up the davit and stands in front of the admiral and salutes.
The Russian says, that gentleman has courage. The American says, pfft. That's nothing.
He calls over a PO and says, I want you to jump off the bows, swim under the ship to the stern and then return.
The PO salutes, jumps off the bow, swims to the stern and climbs back up to stand in front of the Admiral and salutes. The American says, that, gentlemen, is courage.
The British Admiral says, that's nothing. Sailor, come here. The Matalot comes to attention and salutes.
The Admiral says, I want you to climb the highest mast on the carrier, jump off, swim under the boat from bow to stern, and then from beam to beam, then climb up the mast and do it again.
The Matalot looks at the Admiral and says, You can f*** right off, sir.
The Admiral turns to the other two and says, That, gentlemen, is courage.
…were having a drink on an American aircraft carrier. They were talking about the bravery of their sailors.
The Russian said, I will demonstrate the bravery of our sailors. He calls a sailor over and says, jump off the ship, swim under it and climb back up.
The sailor promptly salutes, jumps off a flight deck, swims under the ship, climbs up the davit and stands in front of the admiral and salutes.
The Russian says, that gentleman has courage. The American says, pfft. That's nothing.
He calls over a PO and says, I want you to jump off the bows, swim under the ship to the stern and then return.
The PO salutes, jumps off the bow, swims to the stern and climbs back up to stand in front of the Admiral and salutes. The American says, that, gentlemen, is courage.
The British Admiral says, that's nothing. Sailor, come here. The Matalot comes to attention and salutes.
The Admiral says, I want you to climb the highest mast on the carrier, jump off, swim under the boat from bow to stern, and then from beam to beam, then climb up the mast and do it again.
The Matalot looks at the Admiral and says, You can f*** right off, sir.
The Admiral turns to the other two and says, That, gentlemen, is courage.
the Ferret
Daily rider since May 1965
What really irks me is they pull out in front of me and make me brake, and I look in my rear view mirrors and there is no one behind me as far as the eye can see, which means if they'd have just waited a couple of seconds they would have had a clear road to pull out onto.
A blast from the past...
OP
OP
