🤣 Funny!

Some is intentional, 'I WILL get ahead of you and save two seconds!!' Is an old psychological issue.
What really irks me is they pull out in front of me and make me brake, and I look in my rear view mirrors and there is no one behind me as far as the eye can see, which means if they'd have just waited a couple of seconds they would have had a clear road to pull out onto.
 
If animals could talk …

Tourist. That your dog?

Farmer. Yeah.

Tourist. Mind if I speak to him?

Farmer. Dog don't talk.

Tourist. Hey dog, how's it going?

Dog. Yeah, I'm doing all right, thanks.

Farmer looking shocked.

Tourist again. Is this your owner? Pointing at the farmer.

Dog. Yeah.

How's he treating you?

Ah, pretty good. Walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the park to play once a week.

Farmer still looking disbelieved.

Tourist. Mind if I talk to your horse?

Farmer. Horse don't talk.

Tourist. Hey horse, how's it going?

Horse. Cool.

Farmer still looks shocked.

Tourist, how's your owner? Pointed at the farmer.

Horse, yep.

Tourist, how's he treating you?

Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me, brushes me down, often keeps me in a nice stable to protect me from the weather, but whips me a bit too much.

Farmer still looking amazed.

Tourist, mind if I talk to your sheep?

Farmer, that sheep's a bloody liar!
 
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